Oh, Fortune Cookie...

Spent the other day with my love. We dropped Becca Bear off with my mom and took Andrew to school. We then had an appointment with my Obstetrician.  I had been putting it off. I didn't want to go back to that office.  I met with my Dr. and I had my consultation regarding my labor and delivery, had my exam and then he returned for "the talk".

We talked about all of our options. He explained that my case was rare.  That although there is no real way to "test" for what happened, based on my history, it would appear that there was a problem.  He didn't want to directly come at me with answers. He wanted to refer us to a high-risk specialist who would, he felt, conclude that I had more than likely had cervical incompetency.  He said based on how late I was in my pregnancy, they wouldn't consider it a miscarriage and based on the fact that the baby still had a heartbeat when I delivered. He explained that there is no one answer to explain what happened, and why my case was so rare, was I had two perfectly healthy full-term pregnancy before these two.

We then went over the many options for permanent birth control, like Tubal Ligation, Vasectomy. Things like IUD's, ect.  All a little stressful to think about.

David and I have discussed seeing a specialist, or just saying, "it wasn't meant to be" and us taking the steps to prevent ever getting pregnant again. We have been discussing and exploring adoption as an option for any future children and we have come to the conclusion that it is just all so soon and making any decisions right now would literally be based on emotion. We know that IF we would  like to seek the advice and guidance of a specialist, my Dr. can point us in the right direction. IF we decide that a future pregnancy is just not an option for us, my Dr. can help us prevent that from ever occurring again and at that point the option for adoption will never be off the table for us....as of now, we wait.

Our plan is to just keep living. Move forward and focus on the two we have right here in front of us. Are we ready for another baby? YES....but it was out of our hands and until we can clearly make a decision as for what is right for us, we just keep living.

After several tears and a "crying-induced headache" we went to lunch, just the two of us. After our food, we got our fortune cookies and right there it was, just what I needed to read.

Thanks for the reminder fortune cookie. We went on with our afternoon and will "keep our chins up"